by Team TVWriter™ Press Service
His Satanic Majesty Les Moonves and his minions have announced what shows are coming back next Fall. So all you old-timers who watch that fabulous “Least Desired Demographic” network, sit back in your recliners and take note of what CEO Moonves’ diabolical demons are up to.
“The best way to launch new shows in the fall and throughout the season is to surround them with a strong and stable lineup of successful series,” said Nina Tassler, Chairman of CBS Entertainment earlier this week. “The shows we’re picking up today cut across every night of the week and feature genre leaders, time-period winners and the most-watched shows on broadcast television.”
The 18 series announced today comprise 15.5 hours of CBS’s weekly primetime schedule and include nine dramas, five comedies, two reality series and two news programs.
The nine dramas picked up are: NCIS, television’s #1 drama/scripted program for the fifth consecutive year; NCIS: LOS ANGELES, the #2 drama for the fourth straight year; time-period winnersPERSON OF INTEREST, CSI: CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION, HAWAII FIVE-0 and BLUE BLOODS; as well as CRIMINAL MINDS, ELEMENTARY and the acclaimed drama THE GOOD WIFE.
The renewed comedies are 2 BROKE GIRLS, THE MILLERS, which is the #1 freshman comedy of the 2013-2014 season, MIKE & MOLLY, MOM and the long-running hit TWO AND A HALF MEN.
In alternative programming, the Network announced pick-ups for its Emmy Award-winning reality series THE AMAZING RACE and UNDERCOVER BOSS.
Finally, in news, CBS will return 60 MINUTES, television’s #1 news program for more than four decades, and 48 HOURS, Saturday’s #1 non-sports program.
In addition to these 18 series, CBS yesterday announced a three-year broadcast deal for THE BIG BANG THEORY. Previously, the Network announced two more editions of the reality series SURVIVOR for next season.
And here’s an interesting side note. The CBS audience may be the oldest of all broadcast networks, but, season-to-date, CBS is television’s #1 network in viewers for the 11th time in 12 years, averaging 10.84 million viewers. What does this tell us? Hmm?
It tells me that Les Moonves, The Great Satan, has enlisted the Minions of Hell and sent them out over the broadcast signal to mind-control almost 11 million people. And he’s not done yet. Dunno ’bout you, but I’m covering my cowboy hat with tinfoil. Right after I take my meds.
I don’t know…I’m still waiting for ‘DR. KILDAIRE’ to come back. Until then…I’m locked into my SILENT FILMS, although I wish they’d make the PRINTING a little bigger. Or even the Actors a little smaller. Whatever. gs