How to Celebrate Your New TV Writing Staff Job

Everybody knows what you’re supposed to do as soon as you’re staffed on a TV series. You rush over to the closest cool dealership and buy (or, if your personal corporation is paying for it) lease a new car.

What car you get depends on many factors, most having to do with what’s in fave, automobile-wise, in the biz at the time. Price also plays a part, of course. Right now, auto-ing up goes along these lines:

  • Staff writers get something Japanese
  • Story editors get baby Bimmers
  • Writer-producers get Porsches
  • Writer-executive producers get Mercedes
  • Showrunners get one of each

However, if you’re more practically minded and/or have lots of debts to pay off because you haven’t worked in a very long time (like since you first qualified for the Guild because of what turned out to be a fluke sale of an original screenplay that didn’t get made), you might want to go for something like this (especially if you’re in the Just-Under-30-Just-Getting (or Gotten)-Married/Into a Very Serious Relationship Crowd:

Why are we looking at their rear ends?

Yes, it’s a Mercedes-style pram. Designed to keep peace in the family, which, if you have or are expecting to have, a new baby, is key.

That’s better. Thanks.

Of course, if that seems like too much, there’s always this:

Doctor Who hasn’t said it yet, but he will: “Porsches are cool.” And so are Porsche strollers.

Both these items, and many more wondrously overwrought, outrageously expensive goodies at BornRich.