munchman: HAWAII FIVE-0’s Latest Desperate Move

five-o-recordHaving given up on producing a series viewers might actually want to see, CBS has turned to one of the most uncreative gimmicks known to man. In fact, it’s so uncreative that it’s…well, it’s remarkably like the rebooted version of FIVE-0.

In a not-very-original-or-even-twisty take on the ole “Hey, kids, why don’t you write this show/story/book/movie instead of us?” trope, the network has announced some idiocy it calls the “Fan Built Five-0 Initiative,” through which viewers can vote online for an episode’s various story points, after which the show’s writers (we’re using the term loosely here) will turn the winning points into a script.

Of course, you can’t just feed them any crime, victim, murder weapon, evidence, suspect, or “takedown” (whatever that is). You have to pick from the show’s already pretty damn limited – make that very damn limited – and quite specific list. So that what you choose can, you know, be incorporated into the script that they’ve already written by the numbers, I assume. Just like all of HAWAII FIVE-0’s other by-the-numbers episodes.

img_news_coin_flip No, TVWriter™ isn’t linking to the scene of the crime where this murder of creativity and viewer good will is taking place. Consider that just one of the many public services this site regularly provides.

Actually, I’m smiling as I write this because bright side: CBS is throwing this Hail Mary due to the exciting fact that ratings for this piece of crap are so low (down 21% in the key demo) that it’s pretty much doomed to become history soon.

What was that sound? Oh, right. The real McGarrett heading his head against the coffin CBS has put him in.


4 thoughts on “munchman: HAWAII FIVE-0’s Latest Desperate Move”

  1. I’m sorry to see such a critique of the new Hawaii 5-0. I think it is far superior to the original series. I watched the original series as a kid. The original series was all about Jack Lord. Everyone else was a minor character. Lord was the focus of the show and he seemed very robotic and humorless.

    I like the easy buddy banter relationship between Danny and McGarrett. Scott Caan and Alex McLoughlin are excellent in their roles. Moments of humor between them makes the show fun and the characters interesting. I think that they have built up the secondary actors roles. The scripts were as good as any crime detective show on the air. Some of the episodes featured interesting plot twists. Of course, their is the theme music which is the best theme music of all time.

    I loved the rebooted Wo Fat, the ongoing mystery about the death of the father. I liked it so much that I wrote a spec script for the show. It was called Rules of Engagement. Of course, everyone has shows they like or dislike, but I think the new Hawaii 5-0 is a much better series than Mr. B gives it credit.

  2. Um, isn’t this post signed “munchman?”

    munchman, AKA TVWriter™ Editorial Director Tim Muncher, is the one who wrote that critique, chilton, not me.

    Although I’ve got to admit that for the most part I agree. To me, the problem with the new FIVE-0 is that they’ve given each character, regardless of whether s/he be a hero, a villain, a victim, or a witness the attitude/interests of a 16-year-old. And I haven’t cared much about how 16-year-olds think since my youngest daughter was that age.

    Good to hear from you, dood.


    1. Well, “your mileage may vary” as the old slogan goes. However, I stand by my feelings and post. I don’t find many detective series rising above that level. Certainly not the highly rated, but repetitive NCIS series. I would like to see what the reviewer’s idea of a good detective show. Hill Street and NYPD Blue?

      Of course, my favorite all time detective show was Magnum P.I. I would give honorable mention to the Avengers or Moonlighting, but that would really show my age. I loved the Magnum characters especially Higgins. The exchanges between Magnum and Higgins were priceless. Higgins was fascinating enough to get his own show. My spec script won second place at WildSound film festival in 2011 (shameless plug). I enjoyed the post and didn’t mind stirring up the gumbo to give my two cents. Oh yes, My spec script for Hawaii 5-0 would have been a world class episode. Book ’em Larry..

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